Cruising To The Holidays
I forgot to mention in the previous post about how the lovely and vacation-prone Jo went on a cruise right in the middle of all the moving madness. She's literally been back a week and a half and she leaves again next weekend on another cruise and will be gone the rest of the month. I wish I were joking, but I'm not. That woman has balls the size of my ego. Apparently I should have married a postman because that's where all the money and vacation time is.
I really and truly need someone to please explain the principle behind revolving doors. I hate those damn things and don't see where they serve any purpose at all. And speaking of doors...just to drive the point home of how lazy I am...I was leaving a big government type building today and stood in front of the exit doors for a good 40 seconds waiting for them to open. I just stopped in my tracks and waited patiently. As a line started forming behind me, I snapped back to consciousness and realized that I had to actually lift my arm and push on the door to get it to open. It wasn't automatic. Da fuck?
As a result of white trash family drama Big Daddy and I find ourselves all alone this fine turkey day. So in a stroke of insanity I've decided to cook a Thanksgiving feast. Since I am warm and caring and generous I went ahead and extended an invitation to all of my wayward friends and relatives in similar situations. So Thanksgiving should be interesting. I'm thinking of just getting a keg and some chicken nuggets and calling it a success.
In other holiday news, Mr. Greenlawn across the street has already started decorating his house with Christmas lights. And as far as I'm concerned he's just thrown down the holiday decorating gauntlet. He might have won the greenest-lawn-on-the-planet contest, but the most-giant-inflatable-nylon-Santas-and-Frosty-the-Snowmen-in-one-yard contest is anybody's game!
I really and truly need someone to please explain the principle behind revolving doors. I hate those damn things and don't see where they serve any purpose at all. And speaking of doors...just to drive the point home of how lazy I am...I was leaving a big government type building today and stood in front of the exit doors for a good 40 seconds waiting for them to open. I just stopped in my tracks and waited patiently. As a line started forming behind me, I snapped back to consciousness and realized that I had to actually lift my arm and push on the door to get it to open. It wasn't automatic. Da fuck?
As a result of white trash family drama Big Daddy and I find ourselves all alone this fine turkey day. So in a stroke of insanity I've decided to cook a Thanksgiving feast. Since I am warm and caring and generous I went ahead and extended an invitation to all of my wayward friends and relatives in similar situations. So Thanksgiving should be interesting. I'm thinking of just getting a keg and some chicken nuggets and calling it a success.
In other holiday news, Mr. Greenlawn across the street has already started decorating his house with Christmas lights. And as far as I'm concerned he's just thrown down the holiday decorating gauntlet. He might have won the greenest-lawn-on-the-planet contest, but the most-giant-inflatable-nylon-Santas-and-Frosty-the-Snowmen-in-one-yard contest is anybody's game!
@ 9:54 PM
5 Comments:
You shouldn't have rushed to invite people to Hotlipz village.
You and Big Daddy could have come to Atlanta.
That's where me and the rest of my daughters will be.
Oh Piss, we're both going back to work on Friday and so going out of town is out of the question.
Well then....y'all both work too much...
you're gonna miss all the fun!
Go with the fried turkey. It's a pure crowd pleaser.
Do you know what we do when we stay home for Thanksgiving?
We go out to eat. I highly recommend it. Then you can go home and fall into a coma while someone else cleans the shit up.
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